In the song “How Do I Say Goodbye?” by Dean Lewis, he expressed how much his father means to him as he gets ready to say goodbye to his dying father. The Lyrics are based on the relationship he had with his father who was given less than a year to live last year with a devastating cancer diagnosis. It’s a very touching song of a son who realizes how much his father has done for him in life and what that father means to him.
What really caught my attention was the opening line of the synopsis of this song on Genius lyrics website: “How Do I Say Goodbye” is a touching song in which, as explained by Dean Lewis, the vocalist is mourning his dying father, which honestly is not a particular theme we come across often.
Not a theme we come across often. The more common theme is a deadbeat dad, a missing dad, a bad dad, a Cat’s in the Cradle kind of dad.
Usually, Father’s Day is a time to bash dad or tell them to do a better job. We forget what a blessing fathers really are. I want to challenge you to think about how GOOD and important fathers are.
We have a need for fathers in our lives
It’s easy to bash fathers because we don’t understand their impact like we do moms. But when they are gone, there is a huge void in our lives. Research shows time and time again that children with missing fathers do worse than those with fathers at home. I don’t care what the media tells you, the reality is that dads are deeply needed for successful children. Being a good father starts with being a good man.
Much of my life is shaped as it is because of my father. I originally went to college as a Bible major because I thought it would please my father. When I switched majors, I was scared to tell dad, but he gave me his blessing and said, “I always figured you would go into business.” When I went into ministry and I ran into issues, my first phone call was always to my dad.
Fathers are the anchor of the family
In the midst of a crazy world, it is so comforting to know your father is there and taking care of the family. Just the mere presence of the father brings comfort to children during difficult times.
When the girls were little and we had a very loud thunderstorm the girls got scared. I would go in and lay in one of their beds. When I did, it didn’t take long for them to fall asleep. They weren’t worried about the storm anymore, Dad was there.
Your family should feel the absence of you when you’re not there. They should feel secure when you are there. Mom may be the glue that holds the family together, but you are the anchor that keeps them secure in whatever storm comes into your lives.
Fathers are the spiritual guides of the family
Most of us think of Eph 6:4 when thinking of our spiritual role as a dad. Ephesians 6:4 (ESV) — 4 Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.
The main point Paul was making here was to bring up your children to know God’s teachings and love God with all their hearts.
Solomon wrote a parable that I understand so much better now that my girls are adults. Proverbs 23:24 (NLT) — 24 The father of godly children has cause for joy. What a pleasure to have children who are wise.
Most of my sleepless nights are when I don’t feel like my girls and their husbands are as connected to God as I would hope and most of my happiest days are when I see them living out their faith in a positive way.
Sometimes a child will be Godly despite their parents, but usually it’s because they had Godly parents. When dad was dying, we sat around his bed and prayed and sang together. To this day, I can barely sing Amazing Grace without getting choked up. Between gasps for air he made sure we knew his joy at our faith. That was the most important thing on his mind.
Studies have shown that when the father is a faithful church going Christian, the likelihood of the children continuing in faith after leaving home rises exponentially.
The Prodigal Father
In Luke 15 Jesus tells a story. We have labeled it the Prodigal Son. So many people think prodigal means bad, but it means to spend lavishly, foolishly. Yes, the boy spent his money that way, but the father spent his LOVE that way.
One of the greatest insights of this story is found in vs 20. Luke 15:20 (ESV) — 20 And he arose and came to his father. But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion, and ran and embraced him and kissed him.
“While he was still a long way off”. This father was looking for his son to return home every day. He stared longingly out the window hoping today would be the day his son would return. Some of you need to realize the heavenly father is staring longingly down the road hoping today is the day you will finally come home.
Fathers are a wonderful gift from God and don’t let anyone rob you of that honor. Not the media. Not our culture. Not even ourselves.